Unexpected Reaction

We joined our synagogue months ago, but we hadn’t yet attended services. We seemed to come up with excuse after excuse, and always had conflicting plans.

Finally, last Friday night my fiancé Adam and I went to services at our new synagogue so that we could meet and experience the rabbi that will be marrying us. The rabbi was great, and we got along well, and the service was quite nostalgic for me. I grew up going to similar types of services, and the familiar prayers and songs brought part of me back to being a 12-year-old at my friends’ Bar and Bat Mitzvahs.

Towards the end of the service, though, something unexpected happened. As is the case in most (if not all) services, towards the end of the service, all those in mourning were asked to rise to say Kaddish. When the words started, it hit me. I hadn’t been to services since my grandma passed away… and we said that prayer every day for a week. The tears started, and didn’t stop until well after the last word. It’s so hard for me that my grandma won’t physically be at our wedding… but I know she’ll definitely be there in many other ways.

I pulled myself together, and we met with the rabbi to confirm that he had our wedding on the calendar. Indeed he did, and ours is the first his first wedding he is officiating as the new rabbi of our synagogue! We’ll have a few meetings with him in October, and get to know each other more before our wedding on November 28th.